A Note About Loving Consciously This Valentine’s Day

It seems appropriate to make a post about Loving Consciously this Valentine’s Day, even though I am way past the years of dating. For Valentine Day is not just for celebrating a new romantic love but it is also about celebrating one in a committed relationship. Alex from Thenext45years.com wrote about How to Love Consciously recently. In many ways, it reminded me about what my husband has taught me, and what we have been through. So if you have been facing some challenges in your marriage, do read on….

The initial fireworks that you feel for your partner can appear to give way to a few dwindling sparks, into your marriage. Perhaps, the first signs of disillusionment with romance and love occur when the kids come, when there are never ending bills to pay and/or responsibilities to shoulder. Not unless you keep the fire going, the sparks can just remain a small dimmer, or simply die down.

Admittedly, a committed relationship can never be “new” again. However, there are ways to rekindle some of the positive emotions which were once a part of the initial experience. It will never be the same lustful desire that you feel for each other. Instead, it is a love that transcends time and one that grows, with deeper understanding of your other half, with each passing year.

Loving Consciously is about making a Choice. It is a Choice about staying committed to your partner, come what may. . It is a Choice to understand your partner in every possible way and to put his/her needs before your own often enough. It is about Sharing responsibility in setting up a home and to weather every storm together. It is also about letting each other grow and not smothering each other with selfish motives. You may have sworn to do all these on your wedding day, but it is easy to forget, when two persons start to live closely together, with different needs, temperament and family background.

“Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take.” — Anthony Robbins

In times of disagreement over an issue, do you set aside your ego or do you refuse to back down, insisting that you are right? In times of disagreement about which way to go, do you put your heads together and agree on a common path or do you choose to walk your separate way?

Loving Consciously may sometimes require you to let your partner think he/she is right, even though you still think otherwise. It requires you to be fully present, when your spouse is talking to you. It may mean that you agree to disagree, at times.

“The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but hold hands.”
–Unknown

Obviously, the greatest gift that you can give your partner is the gift of Loving Consciously. When you have this in mind, your actions will follow your thoughts. Loving energy attracts more loving energy. Your spouse reciprocates.

For this Valentine’s Day, if you have not been expressing your love that much lately, pay attention to what your partner is in need of. Is it time to be away from the kids? Is it a note of appreciation? Or simply a walk on the beach? These ideas do not require any money but your action to simply Make It Happen!

“The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between your minds, your hearts, and your souls, the more you will strengthen the fabric of your relationship, and the more real moments you will experience together.”— Barbara De Angelis

Loving Consciously is to build more connections between you and your partner. The more connections you build, the more meaningful your relationship will be. It can be a relationship that transcends time and for all eternity.

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